Your help needed
I’m putting my trust in you, faithful readers. Please don’t let me down.
Turns out I’m needed on the wheels of steel at a friend’s birthday celebration next weekend. It’s a DJ emergency if you will (it must be if they’re calling on me).
So, I’ve dusted off my nimble fingers, re-learnt some of my favourite ninja-quick DJ moves (including the scratch, the helicopter and the bumbo ninepence). But I’m not the finished article yet….
My playlist is taking shape, but I’m looking at it thinking – where’s the killer track? Where’s the classic that’s going to tear the place a new rear? The playlist – it’s good. It’s not great.
This is where you come in. In a massively web 2.0 / interactive / stephenfry@twittery type way, I’m opening up the cyber-request line to you.
I need to know the amazing unknown dancefloor filler that you’d drop which will make the place feel like “they all done gone bombed it up back to mediaeval times shorty”.
The emphasis here is on ‘unknown’, yeah? So no Stone Roses Fool’s Gold’s please. No Underworld Born Slippy Nuxx’s please. And definitely no A-Ha The Sun Always Shines on TV’s please. (You think I didn’t put them on the list already? Then you underestimated Tiny Dan, girlfriend).
And here’s the twist. I need five brilliant suggestions to replace five utterly awful party tracks which I will otherwise play, killing the mood entirely (and possibly killing me, when the party turns ugly).
These are the five all-time worst choices which I am threatening to play:
5 – Vanilla No Way No Way
4 – Celine Dion – My Heart Will Go On
3 – The Tweets – The Birdie Song (Tiny Dan’s not-so-tiny 20-minute remix)
2 – Einsturzende Neubauten – Headcleaner
And number one
1 – Johnny Cash – Hurt (while projecting this famously heartbreaking video on to back wall)
Please stop me unleashing this catalogue of misery on the unsuspecting party-goers. Five great unexpected alternatives now please.
I know I can trust you – you hardy group of avid followers of the thoughts of four people who used to appear alongside a famous bloke on a specialist-interest DAB digital radio station on a Sunday afternoon taking a sideways glance at the week’s news (except me as I couldn’t always make it owing to work commitments).
Can’t think of a song? Mentally weak? Why not email this to a better person than you then? To get in touch, remember that you cannot follow me throughout the year on twitter and I generally limit new facebook friends these days.
If you liked this, then you may like these too
Ain’t no party like a King Coleman party… The Boo Boo Song (Steve Show completists will note from their rolodex entries that I played this on 25th Jan 09…)
Obviously:
Eddie Murphy – Party All The Time
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5LX16zia2k
Plus:
100 Proof (Aged In Soul) – Somebody’s been sleeping in my bed
N-Trance – Stayin’ Alive
Alan Parsons Project – Games People Play
Marva Whitney – Unwind Yourself
I’ll be honest with you, Harr, this hasn’t turned into the million-hitting international viral internet smash I was hoping for.
Maybe I’ll upload a video of my cat falling over while I throw ping-pong balls into cups in a variety of complicated ways. That should do it.
I think I might have set the party-tune-bar so impossibly high that our legions of followers were too intimidated to suggest anything.
Like when you go to the gents in a train station, desperate for a good sit-down, and once you’re in the cubicle you note with horror that someone has left something unfeasibly gigantic lurking in the depths. You just know that anything you attempt won’t be able to compete with this evil colossus, so you slink away, 30p wasted, tail between legs.
Oooh, wait a minute, there’s an unapproved comment from yesterday from imsodave, let’s sort that out…
Djs! The scourge of many a musician from a certain era, And MCs! what the **** is that all about? Oh dear am i blogging out loud again………..yes dear, i will take my tablets now………..No Sammy! please dont hit me …again.